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    nobryp主页 >> 文章 >> >> 浏览信息《農村孝道的衰落》

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    星期一   晴天 
    主题 農村孝道的衰落

      “爹住瓦房孫住樓,爺爺奶奶住地頭”,是中原農村廣泛流行的一句順口溜。順口溜形象地反映出農村祖孫三代的代際關系和孝道衰落的現狀。  爺爺奶奶輩的黃金時代在文革前後,經濟困難,當時僅有給孩子輩蓋瓦房的能力。他們如今已老態龍鐘,喪失瞭勞動能力,由於農村養老制度的缺欠,他們的晚年全靠孩子供養。雖然目前農村經濟有所發展,然而進入“小康”的畢竟是少之又少,大部分農民剛剛解丈夫为什么对我情有独钟呢?決溫飽問題。而孩子輩“上有老下有小”,疲於奔命,無暇顧及年邁的父母。爺爺奶奶輩的宅基地被孩子孫淡淡离愁,淡淡思念子占領瞭之後,隻能在自留地地頭搭個簡易房子度日。但是為瞭掩飾兒孫的不孝,就會在田地裡栽上果樹或者是種上大棚以及其它可能的季節性經濟作物,讓其爺爺奶奶去看守。如此一來,爺爺奶奶輩的晚景相當淒涼,死後數日才被發現的現象時有發生。  爹娘輩也算生活在瞭好時候,政府免瞭農業稅,又能外出打工賺錢,本來小日子可以很滋潤的,可是計劃生育搞得不好(三胎四胎很普遍),“超生”連累瞭他們,多子並沒有多福。農村攀比之風很盛,你蓋樓房,我也必高考录取分数线普遍降低说明什麽須蓋樓房,不給兒子蓋樓房,孩子就找不到對象!再簡易的樓房也得七八萬元,兩個孩子的樓房就得十五六萬!哪裡弄這麼多錢?為瞭錢,他們隻好舉傢外出打工,“父母在不遠遊”的古訓還有幾人知道?於是隻有讓爺爺奶奶輩在荒郊野外啼饑號寒,自生自滅!  農村的樓房如雨後春筍般豎立起來瞭,其實,大多是孫子輩的。在農村“三世同堂”“四世同堂”的幾乎沒有,“娶個媳婦賣個兒”,孩子成傢之後就會與父母分傢,另立門戶。“父子兵”已經土崩瓦解,爹娘輩勢單力薄,隨著年齡作为殉葬品的中国人增大再也無力建房,隻好住在多年前的勉強能遮風避雨的瓦房裡茍延殘喘!  是的,在當今農村孝道已經變味甚至蕩然無存!子女們生活拮據、經濟困難是一個原因,但不是主要原因,因為當今的社會制度比古代要優越得多,農民生活也好過得多,這是毋庸置疑的!可是,為什麼古代人能堅守孝道?  從史料和影視劇可以看出,我國古代都是幾世同堂的傢庭,輩分越高在傢庭中的地位越尊貴。老太太、老太爺要住在堂屋(正屋),兒孫們隻能住在偏房。老人們能夠養尊處優、頤指氣使,而兒孫們隻能唯唯諾諾、低聲下氣。  何以如此呢?中國自古以來就被尊為禮儀之邦,孝敬父母更是子女義不容辭的天職。古代帝王在很大程度上也是以孝來治天下的,因此,也在體制設計以及輿論养生延缓衰老,百岁并非奢望宣傳上強化這些觀念,使之能夠在皇帝的子民中發揮教化的作用。許多朝代甚至把孝道寫進律法,子女不孝順會受到法律的制裁。所以,在傳統社會裡,父母的傢庭地位是不可能被輕易撼動的,孝道也就不能成為問題。  今日孝道之所以衰落,筆者認為主要原因是——  國傢已經不再直接傳輸孝道的標準,道德建構的主體在某種程度上是缺失的,而是單純“依法治國”,隻要不違反法律就是好人。當然,依法治國並非不好。不過就我國目前的國情來看,依法治國隻能是治標不治本。(“依法治國”相當於“西藥”,而儒傢的許多道理相當於“中藥”,治療“內科”的疑難雜癥還得靠“中藥”!)因此,“孝順”“尊敬”“謙恭”之類的字眼被遺忘,道德約束力弱化,農民孝道的標準悄悄發生瞭變遷。很多農村的農民評價兒女孝順與否的標準,已經萎縮到隻剩下是男人不接受女人的爱接受身体否能夠滿足父母生存需要的經濟標準——隻要為人子女的能夠為父母提供維持生活所需的糧食,一般就不會遭受到其他村民的指責。在現在的農民傢庭,代際互惠規范弱化,父對子的義務大多都還存在,但是子對父的義務嚴重弱化。在這樣的氛圍下,在多子女的傢庭中,父母就極有可能在子女“莫須有”的不公正待遇的借口下遭到子女的責怪。在子女之間對於父母行為公正與否的評價中,子女的無道德性的公正觀念得以張揚。長此以往,“父將不父,母將不母”!因此,本來不成問題的事情也就成瞭問題,於是,孝道衰落也就成瞭必然!相关的主题文章:不要與誰去偷情?两成女大学生认可傍大款掴了谁的耳光“梨花体”只是标准缺失时代的怪胎太独立的女人不太幸福吗?!魅姿籠薄霧,雅韻詠斜陽妇女解放,旧话新提我不能抚摸你如妖的寂寞峻石斋诗话(二十七)學佛體會雜談之韓寒
    nobryp 发表于:2013-11-18 22:29:46

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